Take a breather

With all the commotion around us, remember to make it a point to take a moment, take a step back, observe, practice some deep breathing or simply enjoy being as empty of thought as you want to be. It won't be long until you'll have to give it your all again.

Whether you are in a resting or attention position remember that the most important thing is to be in the moment. 110% in the moment, that is. That is when you get both the best rest and the best results.

Can you hear me now?

Funny, right? Unless it's you who is not being listened to.

Most of us listen to about 25% of what is being communicated to us. I know, I know, listening and communication are common threads in this blog, but there never was a more pressing time to start working on our listening skills (afterall, we do want to keep our jobs and progress in our careers, right?). So do what you can, and if you feel you are not meeting your own expectations try again, try harder and try smarter.

I have a good friend whom I always thought had the touch for changing people's mood around. The type who, after a sales person has been openly rude to him, replies "How is your day going?" Not in a sarcastic way but in the most caring and compassionate tone possible. It always amazes me to watch the results: even the rudest most abrasive people make eye contact (sometimes for the first time) and then the magic happens: that moment when an frustrated associate actually sees the person in front of him as a human being.

Besides the obvious results my friend always gets (things done right the first time, a more pleasant person to do business with, quicker service, a discount, etc.) the most everlasting result is that he's likely to have made a positive impact on that person's day and attitude.

So go ahead laugh at the cartoon. Remember all the jerks who mistreated you and vent about it.

But also remember that a graceful human being helps situations by showing, not by telling.

If your listening and empathy skills leave something to be desired, read a book on the subject, ask friends and coworkers to be honest with you and provide you feedback, practice deliberately not interrupting or thinking about what you are going to say next while your spouse, friend or coworker is talking to you, take a class (Rollins College has a fantastic class on the subject)...and most of all, when you think you are done learning...well, then it's time to start all over again.

And remember, the fact that most of us run at 25% capacity that doesn't mean that's the way it has to be. Not if you want to achieve exceptional results anyway.

During a recent conversation with a former colleague about the staggering decline in customer service, as well as employee & customer satisfaction many businesses are experiencing, we found ourselves using feel words. Yes, two mature, objective, career- oriented, type-A business folks using feel words.

We were most amazed by the palpable loss of pride and passion for one’s work. Particularly in these tough times and in spite of this clearly being in an employers market. We exchanged ideas about my prior post (“You can’t fire me!”) and agreed that ignorance is not really bliss.

Ignorance is what propels, otherwise cognitively-aware adults, to overspending money, resources and time. Ignorance has entire populations ‘nurturing’ their bodies with what, in places like Europe, would be banned foods and a host of Genetically Modified Organisms whose consequences nobody seems to know and we remain oblivious to. Ignorance, more times than not, is at the root of wars. And ignorance is the currency poorly performing employees are banking on to keep sucking the life and profitability out of your business.

I cannot tell you what to eat, what to think, how to spend your money, resources, and time. But I can remind you the importance of two key areas for the health of your business:

1. Knowledge of at least the basics of HR Law in your state
2. Knowledge of how your good employees feel about changes and your company’s mission, vision, and long-term direction

In fact, you will notice as you browse through the blog that these are recurring themes for us. And for good reason. We’ve seen businesses hurt their bottom line due to lack of basic prevention, knowledge and simple good use of empathy. We’ll dissect these issues and share some ideas on how to shed some light on them in upcoming posts.

Meanwhile, read, learn, and if you have no time to do either, be sure to contact an HR specialist to hold your hand through the ins and outs of the HR world.

You Can't Fire Me!

One of the great things about working with a new client is learning the background of their employees and discovering some of the reasons behind the culture.

Recently, I was conducting a job analysis for a client in order to put together a strategic plan for utilizing her team members more productively when during an interview one employee told me that he could never be fired. He said that he knew the laws of the state (this was Florida) and that it would take something more than poor performance for him to be fired. Well, I assured him that I was not there to fire him or cause him to be fired. He insisted on trying to convince me that although he was not a top performer, there was no way he was losing his job.

I try to keep the employee interviews that I do confidential so I asked the client who her top performers were and who were some of the team members she thought needed improvement. As I suspected, the employee who assured me he could not be fired turned out to be not only one of the poor performers, but was at the bottom of the list and was a problem employee.

The client showed me a file with a history of documented performance issues for the man who could not be fired. The client was hesitant to fire this employee because of the threats he had made stating that he has attorney friends and that the law is on his side. I volunteered to review the employee's file and made the recommendation that he be terminated immediately.

What from the outside appears to be an open and shut case to most of us is a fearful and confusing one for the employer. It is sad that a small business owner cannot concentrate on planning and producing to create a profitable business to provide for their families, provide income and security for employees, and contribute to the local economy because some knuckle-headed employee is determined to take a free ride at the company's expense. Most employment laws are needed to protect both the employee and employer, but there are some, (most often mis-understood), laws that scare the daylight out of employers and are commonly used by employees, armed with only a touch of the correct interpretation of the law, to threaten the very person who gave them a job with "I will do as I please and you can't fire me!"

We need a hard recession...

...Or so I the staff at Dillard's would have me believe.

Last week I went to buy some shoes. Once I stepped into the shoe department at Dillard's everything about me screamed 'buyer.' Not potential buyer. I was a sure bet, yet the three staff members kept discussing something much more important, ignoring me, hidden under an imaginary tent in plain sight.

People cringe every time I say that we need a good recession or even a depression. But if the current state of affairs has not made people value their jobs I don't know what will. I sent all the right signals, yet nobody came to assist me. Once I approached them they seemed slightly annoyed at my presence, yet one of the sales people finally handed me ONE shoe on my size. "I am sorry, I was born like this, with two feet," I blurted sarcastically as I extended my hand for the other shoe.

What will it take for us to proactively offer the two shoes in everything we do?

Is it a lack on the leadership side?

Perhaps poor benefits or wages?

A manager with poor people and communication skills?

Or, could it be, that employers still hiring the wrong people?

In my consulting business, one of the most common inquires I get from small business owners is about finding ways to fire (why beat around the bush with kinder verbiage?) poorly performing employees without facing a lawsuit. That is why I consider taking the time to hire above average employees & using all available resources to do so, is one of the biggest investments an employer should make. Thankfully, it is one of the highest yielding ones as well.

One would thing that what would follow such a diatribe would be key points to take into consideration prior to extending your handshake and employment offer to a potential candidate.

Well, not exactly. Not in this case. Why? The info is out there online, in magazines, in books, for everyone to benefit from it.

If they really wanted to.

I believe that if we only try to follow a guideline to hire the best we’d be taking a simplistic stance on this matter. I also believe we might be making the cardinal mistake of omission by forgetting to ask ourselves the following seven questions:

1. Do we really want to hire the best?

2. When looking at our current balance sheet, are we in the red or are we in the black profitable pool perhaps due to not paying top dollar to hire and keep the best?

3. Would the prodigious employee, seemingly experienced beyond his years, fit in with our current team or will his presence stir things up to the dreaded point of profitability losses?

4. Are our managers prepared to manage someone who may outshine them?

5. Are we conscioiusly or unconsciously trying to maintain the status quo by enjoying our marginally profitable mediocrity?

6. Are we planning ahead and taking the time needed to hire the best, or are we simply taking the stance of worrying about the urgent while ignoring the important?

7. Do we care more about the way we can market and present our team’s accomplishments, even if a thick makeup layer is needed to create the desired perception, or do we truly embrace hiring someone who might shake things up?

For some companies, in their own narrow, horse-blinder wearing view, it might not be as profitable to hire the best employees they possibly could.

In the end, it truly boils down to the fact we sometimes simply lack the cojones (pardon my Spanish) to surround ourselves by the best.

And the main reason is simply fear.

Listening--Why Bother?

Below is an article that summarizes some key points to help us understand why listening is so important for success. Listening, communication, core values & principles are key aspects of HR Remedies's true North. That is why you will continue to see these as recurring themes in our blog.

The article was written by Bruce Wilson, executive coach & trainer and featured on the business listening site.

Practical Benefits of Better Listening for Leaders and Teams

Besides the deep implications of listening for leadership explored in decades of leadership models, listening has a number of direct, practical benefits for executives, managers, and team members.

Experienced management trainer Madelyn Burley-Allen identifies the following immediate tangible benefits from listening in the work place:

A Bond of Respect. Genuine listening generates respect, rapport and trust between talker and listener. In particular, employees like, and respond better to, supervisors who they think are listening to them.

Productivity. Productivity will be higher and problems solved more rapidly if people working to solve problems are encouraged to explain problems and start working though solutions out loud before "advice-giving" begins

Cooler Heads. Focusing on listening helps both the talker and the listener stay cool--and helps them cool down--when dealing with a crisis or discussing an emotionally charged topic.

Confidence. A supervisor who listens well will tend to have better self-esteem and self-image because they will get along better with others.

Accuracy. Better listening leads to better recollection of important facts and issues later on, resulting in fewer miscommunications and fewer mistakes. Thus, attention to good listening technique is even more important when complex issues are involved.

Parts of this section were inspired by the book Madelyn Burley-Allen, Listening, The Forgotten Skill. A Self-Teaching Guide (Fireside (Simon and Schuster), 1995 (Second Edition)) (>Amazon.com), with interpretation and analysis by Bruce Wilson.
Other motivational benefits of listening in the work place:
Innovative solutions to problems and new production methods are incubated by listening. When a leader tells someone exactly how to do something, or tells them to stop thinking and just keep doing it the way it's always been done, the organization misses out on any improvements that someone might discover by applying their fresh eyes and unique background to solving the problem.

From a different perspective, by not listening to the people who have to get the job done a leader not only chills innovation but also de-motivates by reducing feelings of responsibility, control, and importance.

Finally, it bears noting that Six Sigma, the latest system for total quality management, explicitly recognizes not only the value of the employee viewpoint, but the value to the employee of being listened to. Listening makes employees feel better about themselves and the problems they are working on seem more within their control.

Aren't some of us just too darn effective already to rely much on listening? Even General George S. Patton, the flamboyantly egocentric but highly effective U.S. Army tank commander during World War II, once said:

"Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity."

Cultivating the Work Environment. At IDEO, the company's leaders seek out the creative voice of team members and encourage team members to listen to one another in order to build an office environment that promotes cooperative teamwork and inspired problem-solving.- IDEO uses empathic listening to discover ways to make the work environment comfortable and attractive in order to recruit and retain top people.- IDEO treats the work environment as one of its product development projects. They brainstorm, prototype, and take feedback from team members to zero in on what works.- This approach to work environment encourages a flow of creativity and problem solving rather than focusing team members on barriers and obstacles in their path, such as "who's getting a window office."

Encourage Prototyping. Like brainstorming, prototyping is a way to solicit input from team members and develop empathy with customers. Prototyping is the process of creating and experiencing multiple early versions of your products of services, perhaps with alternative features, before your "final" version is ready for sale.

For example, when facing a one month deadline, try to come up with 5 different flavors of primitive outlines or prototypes after the first week and get feedback from team members about the prototypes to see what directions look most promising. Then prepare a final version. Don't begin by preparing a final version of "best guess" for completion and delivery on day 30, then get feedback after its too late.

Prototyping early and often breaks log jams, builds momentum, and allows course changes before smacking straight into obstacles.

Dealing with adversity as a true leader

The following is part of the Listening Leaders Newsletter sent by Dr. Lyman K. Steil & Dr. Richard K. Bommelje. If you'd like to subscribe or check past newsletters please visit their Listening Leaders site.


"Listening Leaders® regularly face the two-edged challenge of simultaneously attempting to accept and address adversity that enters every listener’s life. Adversity resides around every corner in a period filled with worldwide financial turmoil, a downturn in the world economy, excessive unemployment, real-estate foreclosures, health care challenges, international armed conflict, terrorist threats, energy shortages, excessive individual and national debt, and a contentious political season. Danger lurks everywhere, and Listening Leaders® must learn to accept and address adverse moments as they find them.

Obviously, different people deal with moments of adversity in different ways. However, all listeners will be wise to remember the wisdom of the Roman philosopher Lucretius who wrote, “Look at a man, in the midst of doubts and danger, and you will learn in his hour of adversity what he really is. It is then that true utterances are wrung from the recesses of his breast. The mask is torn off; the reality remains.” The ultimate test of listening may reside in how well one listens when the world around them seems to be falling apart in front of their eyes and ears. As we know, it is easy to listen when one is coasting downhill with the wind at our back and the sun in our face. The greater challenge is meeting the task of readiness for the moments when the road turns steep and rocky, and the wind and the rain are in our face. For it is in these moments when Listening Leaders® multitude of honed skills of listening truly pay-off.

Accepting and addressing all moments of adversity becomes easier if one listens with planned preparation, an understanding of relevant listening principles, and practiced listening skills. Preparation is critical as adverse events often appear when one may least expect them. Simply put, wise listeners plan and are prepared for the unexpected. They project negative possibilities and create strategies for rational processing and responding. In the process, Listening Leader’s® build solid foundations from which they can address adverse events.

In addition, the challenges of dealing with adversity require a deep understanding and application of Listening Leader® Principles. Assuming “Primary Responsibility” for effective listening becomes heightened in all adverse moments. Moreover, difficult times demand that listeners “Find and Align the Purpose” of every communication. One cannot run from, or ignore, any significant challenge of the moment.

Finally, listeners will find it easier to address any adverse issue if they develop their skills of effective listening through extensive Practice of “Identifying and Using Structures, and Identifying and Controlling Distractions and Emotions.” The adage, “perfect practice makes perfect” holds great significance in moments of adversity. Prepared listeners who have developed practiced skills will always trump the unprepared and un-practiced listeners. For as the Irish poet, W. B. Yeats observed, “We begin to live when we have conceived life as a tragedy.”

In times of adversity, Listening Leaders® will profit by accepting and adopting the simple observation of the Australian poet, Adam Lindsay Gordon, who wrote: “Life is mostly froth and bubble. Two things stand like stone, Kindness in another’s trouble, Courage in your own.”

So as we continue our quest of “Advancing listening leadership throughout the world,” we challenge all Listening Leaders® to accept and address adversity where you find it.

LISTENING LEADER® KNOWLEDGE NUGGET: Listening Leaders® accept and address adversity.

In the Winter of 1776-1777, Thomas Paine endured the travails of adversity in the dark hours of the Revolutionary War. Conditions were brutal, yet Paine established an invaluable and timely road map for all Listening Leaders® facing moments of adversity.

Paine wrote: “These are the times that try men’s souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value.

I call not upon a few, but upon all: not on this state or that state, but on every state: up and help us; lay your shoulders to the wheel; better have too much force than too little, when so great an object is at stake.

Let it be told to the future world, that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive, that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet and repulse it. Say not that thousands are gone, turn out your tens of thousands; throw not the burden of the day upon Providence, but ‘show your faith by your works,’ that God may bless you.

It matters not where you live, or what rank of life you hold, the evil or the blessing will reach you all. The far and the near, the home counties and the back, the rich and the poor, will suffer or rejoice alike. The heart that feels not now, is dead: the blood of his children will curse his cowardice, who shrinks back at a time when a little might have saved the whole, and made them happy. I love the man who can smile in trouble that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. ‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death.”

Two hundred and thirty-two years later, Thomas Paine’s invitation continues to hold value for present day distressed Listening Leaders® everywhere.

LISTENING LEADER TIP OF THE WEEK: Embrace moments of adversity.

GOLDEN CIRCLE LISTENING LEADERS QUOTES OF THE WEEK:

Adversity introduces a man to himself ~ Anonymous

It never rains but it pours ~ Proverb

Prosperity doth best discover vice: but adversity doth best discover virtue ~ Bacon

When sorrows come, the come not single spies, but in battalions ~ Shakespeare

We are all strong enough to bear the misfortunes of others ~ Duc de la Rochefoucauld

We are always in the forge or on the anvil ~ Henry Ward Beecher

The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials ~ Chinese Proverb